Dance assault

Using the word disturbing is an understatement to describe what is happening in the danchehall realm of Jamaica. The video above shows a woman  being dragged around and treated like an inanimate object by men who have mothers, sisters and possibly daughters.

This kind of display is quite often the only thing that can be seen making waves across the varying social medias about my little home on the rock. It breaks my heart to see the level of violence and stupidity that has taken over the people of Jamaica.  With a vast majority of the population only seing violence as limited to murder and continue to be desensitized to the  violence against women and children that is rampant in the country and seems to be escalating on a rapid level, while being masked as fun.

When I watched this video, I could clearly see that this poor (silly) woman was trying, on several occasions, to escape her attackers but was unable to because they surrounded her like a pack of wolves going for the kill. The other sad thing is, the DJ was encouraging the behaviour  and boosting the croud to continue to cheer on these wild animal. Whats disheartenng to me about this seen, is that all the other patrons instead of helping this woman, were busy taking videos thinking of all the possible hits on their social media.

We have been so far removed from our humanity that we no longer see people needing help but click baits for social media fame.

But this post isnt about the effects of social media, but about the continued degradation of morals in Jamaica and the acceptance of violence as the norm. This woman here and countless others are being literally assaulted at these dance parties, all in the name of fun. Not even animals are treated in the manner in which these women are being handled and it’s all for what…fun? Violence is so normalized in Jamaica that unless someone is literally dead we don’t see certain beahviours as violent. Violence against woman as also been with us since the beginning of time and even though we have put laws it place, women still seem to be at the wrong end of a fist, a foot, a gun or knife. This behaviour is even learned and reinforced in the younger kids where videos of similar content and even worst are popping up on social media but the participants are much younger than the ones in this case.

I dont know when we will recognize that the only end result of tolerating these behviours is women being actually raped in these situations. Why do we always have to wait untill things get to the worst point before we take action. I hope that the voices of the few people who are speaking out against this new trend are being heard and the necessary stakeholders are taking steps to curb this trend before we have a rape epidemic on our hand. These  women clearly have no say in how they are being handled in the dancehall and that coupled  with all these horney and physcally strong men, i see a recipe for disaster. I hope I am just a pesimist and things don’t actually end where I see them going, if it (rape) hasnt actually happened before.

This video personally said it best, these men should be spending time in prision for these assualts disguised as dance.



Weekly Photo Challenge: Faces-Sand Art

Summer 2015, Japanese sand castle competition at Chirihama Beach Hakui city, Ishikawa, Japan. The Japanese are very talented builders and even with something as temporary as sand castles, they go all out in their craft.  This may have been inspired by the fifth animal in the Chinese zodiac–The Dragon. Look at that face. The Dragon represents confidence and intelligence. Do you have the Face of a dragon?



If I see ‘of’ misused one more time

OMG, I am literally going to explode if I read another comment and see people using the word ‘of’ incorrectly. Where did this new wave of illiteracy come from? Is it a trend that I don’t know about? Please someone tell me, did the meaning and usage of the word ‘of’ change in the recent year. I am a teacher of English (second guessing my usage of the word of right now. sigh) and I am supposed to be au fait with the varying changes that occur in the English language, but this one has clearly slipped me.

I am well aware that as we develop as the human species, we invent new things, we coin new words which sometimes get added to the dictionary and graphed into the language. I am  also aware that many things don’t make sense in the English language. Like, goose becomes geese but moose doesn’t become meese. It just is a difficult and silly language. But with that said, certain words and their function are literally set in stone, like the word of. There is no time, or space, reason or season that I can think of that would justify changing the meaning and usage of the word of. But that doesn’t stop people from blowing up every social media time line throwing ‘ofs’ all over the place like nobody’s business.

Everyone has free will, to do what they want, when they want and how they want. But should free will be an excuse for people to be dropping abominations such as this?


I kid you not. The woman wrote “of been noticing that too.” I’ve seen many crazy usage of the word of and the most prominent one is usually could/should/would of been… But this one was just mind blowing. For a pronoun that separates a human from an inanimate object to be changed into a preposition, is just crazy. And you know whats funny, this atrocity that we see permeating social media and possibly real verbal dialogue between people is coming from… guessed it, the great America. Why Americans, why?

The same people who were outraged at Rihanna’s song “Work” calling it pure gibberish because she was using a non standard vernacular that they seem to look down on. Americans basically think every other language is below their version of English and other people across the world should make it their duty to learn English so that they can communicate with them when they go to visit their country, but when I see things like this I wonder, do Americans themselves know how to use basic English? This is not advanced English, this is the basic stuff. I mean come on.  I know they are going to say oh, that’s black America. Those n****rs are stupid as hell with their Ebonics but I can tell you, I have seen this stupidity across a wide racial cross section. It ain’t just the black people.



I wasn’t lying.

But, the race of the person who uses it is beside the point but also kinda the point. This obnoxious butchering of the English Language is actually more popular among African Americans and is testament to the poor quality of the education system in Black America. I am from Jamaica, where we speak both English and creole and I know that it can be a difficult task to teach kids (who speak another language) English, but I also know that this basic level of English isn’t even something to teach, it just is. So I cannot fathom what has caused this shift in the ability of people in an “English Speaking”  country, such as America, to actually make proper use of simple words such as I’ve, have been etc. I really don’t get it.

Maybe these smart phones are actually making us dumber than we think. This auto correct isn’t a joke. I know sometimes auto correct messes up the sh**t out of what we type and before you know it  you post a comment and you have the internet grammar police on your ass. But I know this isn’t one such  instance when auto correct is the guilty party. I know this is evidence of the deterioration of the human brain. I bet even though there was that bright red line under that word ‘of’in both those comments, the people behind those comments had no idea why that red line was there.

In the end, no one is perfect and people should be tolerant of other peoples languages, abilities and disabilities. But also, it is our duty to identify and address problems that we see arising in the society and when a person who learned English as a second language knows more English/ English nuances than actual native English speakers, Houston we have a problem.

So cheers to freedom of speech, but please if you choose a particular language to express that freedom, try to use it properly. And Americans, stop being so “judgy” at other people’s vernaculars, because you ain’t perfect either.

Work, work, work work, work, seh me affi work work….

Don’t Go Chasing Waterfalls

“Don’t go chasing waterfalls, please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to” are words that I grew up listening to, thanks to the group TLC. I really thought that I understood these words because I learned from it to appreciate the little that  I have but I still thought and still do think that waterfalls are worth chasing.

Now I have a new appreciation for the rivers and the lakes that I was used to. Having been living in Japan for the past 10 months, the word world wind is an understatement to describe the journey that I have undertaken. I have literally and figuratively given up all the rivers and  lakes that I am used to, to venture out into the great big world on my own.

Though I have pretty much been on my own all my life being home in the place that I know has always given me a level of comfort. I have never had many friends and I am not very close with my family but knowing that they were there, just a few hours drive away, though I have never actively thought about it, was a comfort. I remember few years ago having experienced one of the worst things in my life, I called my mother, crying, I didn’t even have to tell her what was wrong, I just asked her to come. And by the next morning she was there with me, still not knowing what was wrong but just being there simply because I needed someone.

I have always lived a lonely and independent life and I have written about this in past posts. My tag line thoughts of the socially retarded is testament to this. I have a hard time making friends because I don’t trust that anyone will stick around so I don’t even bother with the feelings and sentimentality. I am cordial to most and I am quite kind but I  have always been burned when I try to venture into the friendship zone with people. But regardless, I have always had that one or two persons who I can call on when I am most in need, but in the general sense I have lived a lonely life. And this was the very reason I decided to take the plunge and venture out in the world and travel half way around the world.

I was confident in the fact that my lonely life would be perfect preparation for such travels. I wouldn’t have to experience separation anxiety or any of the crazy emotions people experience when they have to say goodbye to their home. I lived alone and I’m not too attached to the material so this would be as easy as baking a cake (from a box). I insisted that I wouldn’t even entertain the idea of starting a new relationship because I just didn’t want the baggage of someone else’s feelings when I was on my adventure.  I just wanted to look forward to all the wonders that were possible once I got to Japan. And if I wanted to stay for five years, I would because I wouldn’t have anyone to consider but myself. This might sound selfish but I was actually thinking of the other person, I didn’t want to put anyone through a long distance relationship and also I didn’t want to put myself through the stress that comes with not being present in a relationship.

But life has a way of giving you what you want and also what you don’t want  need. Just six months before my departure, I got a work reassignment. At this new work location, i ended up meeting this genuine soul who at the time I didn’t know, would literally be my backbone leading up to my departure and to my survival in Japan.

Japan is unlike anywhere else that I have ever been or any experiences I have had before. Reading and watching videos about life in japan can in no way prepare you for living here. Your overall experience is dependent on several variables, most of which are absolutely out of your control. The plain truth is, Japanese customs, traditions and norms having nothing in common with anywhere else in the world and if you don’t speak Japanese, its like being thrown into an ocean with a block around your neck. How do you survive this?

And that’s how I have felt since being in Japan. I have had some fun times, but mostly I feel like I am drowning. I literally just feel out of place. And now I have learned to appreciate what I had before I came here. I have found a new love for my home, Jamaica with all it flaws. This experience has taught me truly the meaning of there’s no place like home. I have a new appreciation for the people that I have had around me for the years. even though we were not apart of each others day to day lives but knowing that they were there was a great comfort that I wasn’t aware of before coming here. I guess not speaking (face to face) to a single person in weeks does that to you.

I am thankful that even though I didn’t want a relationship before I left for Japan, I got one anyways. This beautiful soul has been there for me more than I can remember anyone else ever being. He has been there through all the tears, all the anger, all the regret, all the doubts and all the happy times. He has reminded me of my strength and helped me to appreciate the areas where things are getting better.

I have learned that life isn’t meant for anyone to be alone. So, go and chase those waterfalls, but don’t forget about your rivers and lakes.

Thank you for the Loss of Sleep

you not only act like a child but you have discredited all the actions that I have taken today which to a normal, mature, well thinking individual would prove that I am taking steps that aren’t normal and are out of my way to show you how I feel. But all that is irrelevant right? Because you have decided that your ego has been hurt or bruised, by no deliberate action of mine. You eavesdrop on a conversation, take a snippet of it out of context and now I’m held in contempt. even when I have brought up several situations where you have done worst to me deliberately, you still remain dismissive. you have dismissed my feelings, you have dismissed my efforts and you have dismissed me. At the very least, even though you had no real grounds to be upset, I acknowledged your hurt, walked in your shoes, and apologized, but that wasn’t enough. You can’t fit in my shoes, because all you can see is your ego. you cant see how your histrionics have caused me hurt. no all you see is your hurt, all you can see if your self. even though I asked you not to go to bed angry at me, apologized sincerely and reassured you of my affections, I was still dismissed. I really do hope you will sleep well. Ill be losing sleep, tonight, and maybe tomorrow night, but eventually I will sleep fine.

The thinking


I am who I am, inspite of many things. I have been shaped and developed, molded and bent…but I have never been broken. I have chosen to live how I do. Chosen to make the difficult decisions, knowing they would not be easy. My baggage is colorful, with many pieces, but it can easily be handled and carried by myself alone. But there are moments when it seems too hard…that I have had to be strong too long. I am competent but it doesn’t mean I don’t want  someone to help me. The idea that I could be protected, cherished, cared for and loved, seems like a distant childhood memory. Too many times people shut down, become hardened by their experiences, but I am not one of them. Perhaps its because I made the choice to be where I am, knowing what would happen as a result. Maybe its because…

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The Voice Inside My Head

Why the hell cant I just say what wtf I want to say to  people? Why is it that even when my unbridled tongue is justified I still hold back? Am I a coward?

Countless times, friends, family, relations and otherwise piss me off so much. They do so much to disrespect me, to hurt me deliberately or otherwise. All these instances arise from them not ever thinking of how what they say and sometimes do will affect me. As long as they are comfortable people feel the need to say whatever comes to mind, no matter the repercussions.

But as for me I can never muster up the courage or whatever is necessary to be so blunt with a person even when it is deserved. This officially pisses me off. Why cant I just say what I fucking think and just get it over with? I always end up having arguments with myself in my head of the things that I should have said. And this is not because I am not witty enough to have said them on spot, because I usually think of them at the time but I always end up saying some milder version in an attempt not to completely crush a person.

For someone who usually does’t care to be friends with a person who I’ve argued with, I really go through pain staking measures not to cause irreparable damage. Even today, I found myself typing an entire text message to send out and deleting the whole thing because I knew it would have caused serious hurt to the receiver. But what I typed needs to be said and exactly in the words that I typed it. Now its not and wont expressed typed or otherwise. The context and atmosphere befitting is null and as such the impact will be diminished and possibly miss interpreted. So now and like many other instances, I live with what I want to say on the inside and sometimes, most times even if opportunity presents itself more than once, I still never say what I really want to say.

The way I see it is that even if I don’t care to be friends with a person, a person is a person and I should still be considerate of his/her feelings. But why though, since no one seems to be considerate of mine.

Even though I wish I could just tell people what the fuck I really want to say to them, the truth is I don’t have it in me. I end up feeling horrible if I say something really nasty to a person, even if its the truth, so inadvertently, I hurt myself.

A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

prelude to the death of a fling

the turbulence starts

initiated by nothing

like a gentle breeze

its the calm before the storm, then

your flung into a world wind

the things that were once attractive

becomes what sets it off

your at fault in all you do

simple everyday actions take on

new interpretations

you find yourself justifying

explaining, holding back

more and more

everyday, a piece of your soul

dies, a slow death

you’ve erased so much of

who you are you?

You ask your self, as you destroy who you were

to become who he wants

but its never enough, the distance still grows

your pain is ignored, the tears flow

unnoticed, your hurt unresolved;

ricochets, inside you

with no escape,

and while you lose yourself,

you still lose what you lost you for.A81ECJ

For Inhibitions

Life has a strange way of kicking me

Every time I go against my instinct

The walls come crumbling

Happiness is just an illusion

Why do I bother to chase it?

The moment I let go of inhibitions

Take a plunge

Make the attempt, against better judgment

To live, to laugh

Life just takes over

And reminds me just how muck

It sucks

In everything, there is a time; a place

A season and a reason

Some get everything and some

Get nothing

They cycle of life continues

Just a few lines of my thoughts  written in 2 minutes and a reminder that my happiness should really solely depend on me because every time I leave it up to someone else, I always end up recovering, pulling myself out of some unnecessary trench of sorrow, pain and heartache. I’ve never disappointed myself and I have learned from  long ago that the only one I can truly depend on is myself. But like most I suffer from that one flaw that unfortunately I can’t correct…I am human.

A friend once asked me if reincarnation was real, what would I want to come back as? I said a fish and my friend got very upset, because, he thought that I was stupid to want to be a creature of chance. Just a little fish without intelligence,  a thing that can be caught in a net and just die or be eaten or something like that. Of course he forgot that there are actually bigger fishes in the sea that don’t necessarily live such a chance life, but that was irrelevant because I really wasn’t thinking of being a whale. Just a tiny fish with the entire ocean surrounding me.

My friend actually was appalled that a human being would denounced being human, the greatest thing ever invented, and choose to be an insignificant fish. But, it was much deeper than that for me. Humans believe or not are really not all that.

“Blue is the ocean
Calling me in
Calling me near
If I could only learn
To breathe down here
I know I would be
At home under the sea
Yeah” ___Leanne Rimes

This verse at that time and for many years while I was growing up spoke to me because it encapsulated my exact feeling about life as a human. And today, in a time when I was most happy, in a split second I was brought right back to this place. But hey, on the bright side, I have learned to swim and now I can actually take a real plunge in the ocean every once in a while. Come to think of it,  the ocean did play a part of what sank my happiness today, but I’m not letting that ruin the sea for me, after all, it really was an innocent bystander in the whole shebang.

I still hold steadfast to my desire to be a fish. If hurt is all I can get from humans, I’ll take my chances in the sea, second time around.

P.S. Ignore the context, focus on the art.