If I Step on your Toes…?

If I step on your toes but didn’t do it intentionally or much worst found it funny, does that mean that you’re not or shouldn’t feel the hurt I inflicted?


Black Face. The age-old issue of people dressing up as black people for whatever god damn reasons they can come up with. Its funny, it’s for Halloween so relax, it’s our culture, its whatever. It doesn’t matter the reasons that people want to come up with for perpetuating or accepting this demeaning practice. Nothing justifies blackface, no matter where in the world it’s being done, from Hollywood to Holland to Japan or China. The mockery of black people’s bodies, cultures and overall existence is just not ok, and we should not have to be telling people this over and over and over again.

In Jamaica, we have a saying, “frog say, what is joke to you is death to me.” This saying perfectly sums up the situation that black people constantly face with other races insistence on donning black face every chance they get. You find it funny, but this representation of black people has done what can be said to be irreversible damage to the perception of black people by others and how many black people see themselves.

Blackface was started in Hollywood and widely promoted across the United States and many other countries and,  contrary to what the defenders of this cruel practice want to think, no one was doing black people any favours dressing up with ridiculously shine black polish and exaggerated pink overdrawn lips and excessively large butts.  Blackface wasn’t started to create positive representations for black people, it was done out of pure hate and racism and want intent on mocking and further dehumanizing a group of people who fought hard to be granted by men the very rights given to everyone else at birth, by our creator.

In a recent post from Asian Boss titled “What do the Chinese think about black people (blackface)” it is seen where though many of the respondents know that blackface is rooted in negativity and emerged from a place of hate, they still see it as ok for them to do it because it’s just for fun. Even when told that its offensive to black people they still insist on saying their intent wasn’t bad and its just for laughs so black people shouldn’t be upset. If that wasn’t enough to get one riled up, scan the comments and you see people from all walks of life, even some black people, making excused and going as far as saying by us saying blackface is unacceptable in any manifestation we are playing the race card.

How are we playing the race card when there is so much history of blackface and the damage it has caused in the past and in the present? How is it playing the race card when you never see black people dressing up as other races to make fun of them and treat them as some cartoon caricature, over exaggerating their features and acting dumb? Everyone has something to say about black racism and usually that something is that it doesn’t exist and it died with the old folks. Everyone is quick to tell black people that it’s not a race issue its a class issue, not realizing that for black people race and class are one in the same. No matter how much a black person earns or where they live, that doesn’t stop them from being wrongfully arrested and killed, that doesn’t stop them from being followed around in stores or denied service and especially in Asia it doesn’t stop people from not sitting beside them on the train or from not telling their screaming children that it is ridiculous to be afraid of a person’s color.

Black people know racism because we have been on the receiving end of it from the day we are born till the day we die. Just like a lawyer doesn’t walk into a conference for medical doctors and act like they’re an authority on medical issues, it is the same way that it’s wrong for others to try to make excuses for why black people shouldn’t react how they do to acts of racism because they cant speak to the nuances of anti-black racism. I go back to my initial question, if step on your toes unintentionally and or laugh about it, does that make it hurt you any less or at all? No, you still feel the pain of my actions whether I deliberately did it or not.

I am currently living in Japan and its true that anti black racism is very suble here and some people may not even want to call it racism but when youre looking up jobs to apply for and you see white only, or only requests for people from what is conceptualised as white only countries, or parents asking for their kids to be taken from the class with the black teacher and be put in the class with the white teacher, or when kids are acting a fool and crying when they see black people and the parents response is not to teach them that this person is just human with a different skin color, instead they cuddle and sheild said kids from the big bad black person. These are stories or things black people have to deal with every day and much worst being spat on or having their black or biracial kids face bullying when they go to school and have to hear stories about how a radish is black and dirty because it didn’t shower properly. All of this is just damn ridiculous and quite frankly there is no excuse for any of it.

It’s funny how people come up with the excuse that Asian countries are homogenous and so we have to be patient and tolerant with people’s offences because they are based on ignorance. But, on the flip side, black nations are always so open and accepting of others who don’t look like them and who they don’t see in their everyday existence. Yes, Asia is homogenous but so is 90% of the places that black people live. We too only see non-black people on tv or read about them in stories.  Sure, black children may stare and even touch the hair and skin of a foreigner, but that’s normal curiosity expressed by children. Correct me if I am wrong but I have never experienced, seen or read of any instances where black people have treated none black people in any manner that makes them feel less than human, not black children and especially not black adults. So why then is it normal for us to see and treat others as humans but we have to deal with this kind of nonsense the world over?

When a black person says blackface is offensive, listen to them. Don’t counter with any nonsense excuses about why it could be something other than the offence it is. Better yet, stop dressing up as black people if you do and when you see it being done by others, use the opportunity to educate them and help to get rid of this nasty practice once and for all.  We cant build bridges if the aggressors constantly refuse to acknowledge that there is a need to build a bridge in the first place. And for God sakes, stop making the excuse that it’s difficult to find a black person to do something because black people are everywhere and though referred to as a minority in America, worldwide we are still one of the largest populations.

See the video in the link below

Asian Boss

What are your thoughts on the perpetuation of blackface and on people’s insistence of finding reasons why black people should forget all the damage that it has caused and just laugh at this despicable depiction and disrespect to us and our cultures?



The Penny Section of modern Dancehall

It is no secret that music has a profound effect on the mental state of a person. We experience it every day when we play music to lift our spirits, for motivation when working out or doing chores and even to help us connect with other feelings such as sadness or a broken heart

I grew up hearing the term penny section, not really understanding what it meant. I knew it was associated with making noise because they term is always used with be quiet but it wasn’t until I was in the 5th year of school,  studying Shakespeare, that I learned how that term came about and what it truly meant.

The penny section referenced the poor people or peasants in European theatre history. These people were basically the poor who earned in pennies and as such, when they walked or moved in the slightest the pennies would jingle. These people also paid very little to enter the theatre and were very rowdy. It is believed that the sexual innuendoes in the plays written by Shakespeare were to appease the penny section because the complexities of issues discussed by works such as Shakespeare was above the competencies of the underprivileged penny sectioners.

In looking at how the Jamaican DanceHall genre/scene has changed in the past few years, it was this thought that came to my head. Dancehall music has now become a style that only appeases the penny section of Jamaica.

Recently, I was viewing and old video posted by vlogger @duttyberry where Sean Paul was lauded for yet another number one song on the billboard charts having collaborated with @Sia on the hit Cheap Thrills (which I absolutely love). The song is a true reflection of the growth of dancehall music and all the barriers that past dancehall artists have broken to help position our music as one that is not only for the night but also can be listened and enjoyed during the day at a family BBQ or Office Party.

But to no surprise of mine, there was the penny section complaining about the fact that @Vybzkartel is the best thing in dancehall, in fact, some fans even say he is Dancehall. I can admit that Vybz Kartel is quite a talented artist and I have liked many of his music over the years, but I have disliked far more than I have liked. There’s no doubt that Kartel has shaped the recent image of the Jamaican Dancehall scene as is evident in the lyric style of many other artists who have followed in is foot step or have been given a “buss” by Kartel and or his management team. One name comes to mind @Alkaline who has not only copies his lyrical style and delivery but even his look.

I remember when I was a young girl listening to dancehall music, the days when dancehall wasn’t just catering to peasants so to speak. The truth is, Dancehall has always been sexually lewd and even violent but there was a certain je ne se qua associated with how the issues were presented. I remember songs like “Fowl Affair: Silvercat, Debbie’s Cat: Mega Plough and even more recently These Streets: Tanya Stephens ” that discussed sexuality in a manner where a child could easily listen to the lyrics and not comprehend the double meanings of the song. The old fashioned dancehall, that is missed by many Jamaicans, shows skill and craft my the writers and musicians. It shows a true understanding of the art of writing and the use of literary devices in writing. It basically shows, what I would outrightly call intelligence.

Modern Dancehall lacks this kind of intelligence craftiness and these days literally nothing is hidden in similes, metaphors and personifications, hyperboles etc. Everything is out there for the world to hear and see, in not just the lyrics but the dance videos associated with them. After all the work that had been done by various dancehall artist to include Sean Paul, one of Dancehall’s biggest international crossover artists, we are now being taken back to the point where dancehall music is being scoffed at by various countries (UK, Trinidad and Barbadoes)  and even by Jamaicans themselves. It is quite an irony of sorts where the person that the penny section are crowning king of the dancehall, can’t even perform outside of Jamaica, regardless of him currently serving a long term sentence for murder.

It is no secret that music has a profound effect on the mental state of a person. We experience it every day when we play music to lift our spirits, for motivation when working out or doing chores and even to help us connect with other feelings such as sadness or a broken heart. It, therefore, can be said that music may also have a negative impact on people/society as it does a positive one and as Jamaica’s Dancehall penny section takes over so has the ultimate degradation of the society. The whole culture of Jamaica seems to be going down the drain with everything being over-sexualized and violent as is represented in the music now consistently published in the Dancehall.

I am no social scientist, but I am a thinker and I can’t help but think that the over saturation of mediocrity in Jamaica, in many aspects but more pointedly in the music that we listen as a society have had a profound impact on the current state of mind and ultimate behavioral manifestations that we see in Jamaica today.

As the Mahatma Gandhi states, “a man is a product of his thoughts” which is more commonly expressed in Jamaica as so a man thinketh so is he, it can’t be any clearer that what we feed our minds is ultimately what we will become. So if Jamaicans to a great extent are feeding their minds with overly violent and sexual content, even as very young children, then is there any surprise that the society is manifesting these very things?

“Music can change the world because it can change people.”
― Bono

What do you think about this situation, please share in the comments.



When will we be united,

when will our souls stop feeling the loss of you,

when will you recognize that its time for you to stand up for us

when will you stop being apart of what hurts us

When will you see that together we are better than apart

when will we stop shedding tears because you keep messing with our hearts

When will we not need to be strong

When will we be able to unlaod some of the burdens

When will we be able to not demand better, but experience it

When will you recognize that we are a reflection of each other, that if you’re broken then we are also

When will we be able to recieve full comfort and support from you with all that we face

When will we recover our value and our grace

Recognizing that we are together in this space

Fighting together for the upliftment of our race

We need you, we need you to stop being part of  the reason we are broken

we need you to see each of us, whether you know us or not

as a sister, a mother or daughter – and want the best for us

We need you to get away from the promiscuity,

This was taught to you to break our family

we need our daughters and sons to see

the reflection of what our creator meant things to be

the black man together with a black woman, like yin and yan

working together, not in competition.

Let your black woman help you and show you support

Let us love you and be your mate

that’s how we started out black man

and even though it may seem so, I dont think its too late

But everytime I am hurt by another one of you

I cant help but lose faith

But I dont want it to be, black man

Because I know that there is none like you and they were wrong

I know the struggles you’ve had to bare, and I know you are strong

but the same struggles are what we share, so allow us to be there

We need each other, cause together is the only way we can answer


Let when be now.



White life + Blue Life: American Police lives matter twice as much.


Another one bites the dust….I guess that’s the song being sung by all the white supremacist racist people who have been all over social media defending the murderous cops who stole the life of #AltonSterling last night in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. I spent the better half of my day mourning the death of a man that I have never met. Even though I didn’t know Alton Sterling,  that didn’t prevent me from experiencing serious trauma from the execution of this man. I didn’t know him but I don’t need to know him to see him as my father, my brother or any of my male relatives. I also couldnt help seeing myself in him, because as been recently proven by Sandra Bland’s death, the only weapon that a black person needs,  man or woman, is melanin.

This incident is one of the many that the #BLACKLIVESMATTER movement can attribute its genesis to. Black lives are being threatened everyday not just in America but all over the world, in America it’s just more violent.But instead of saying yes, black lives do matter just like everyone elses, we have to hear chants from white supremacists about white lives and blue lives, both of which are not in any way threatened on a daiy basis. Blue lives and White lives have never been a target for extermination by any organized group or system. White lives nor blue lives don’t have to wake up everyday with the reality that though they may be in good health, the day may be their last, simply because they wear a skin that has been demonized for centuries. Melanin makes you guilty even when you’re  not. For all those who are saying that this isn’t a race thing, since the police were clearly under no immediate threat and the man was not comitting a crime, please explain why then was he murdered in the streets? I would say like an animal, but we all know you value the lives of animals over that of black people. Hashtag justice for Harambe, yeah, justice for a fucking gorrila but not for an innocent man who was executed in the streets by white cops.

Arrest by definition is a stoppage or sudden cessation of motion. Arrest doesn’t mean you cant ask questions, it doesnt mean you have to lay on the ground but for American cops, once the “suspect” is black they have to stop breathing to convince the police that they are not “resisting arrest” because even the involuntary up and down motions of the chest cavity when breating is seen as a threat to me exterminated once that person is black. And if I am reaching, down below is video evidence of what actual resisting arrest looks like and the  man managed to escape with his life intact. I know some of you are “color blind” but you dont need glasses to see what’s obvious in these instances. The offender in this case wears the skin of automatic goodness, the skin of superiority, the skin of morality and so even when behavior dictates otherwise, he is still given the benefit of the doubt and gets to go home to his family.


This isn’t even the only evidence of the obvious bias against black people by white police officers, just check this video below and you’ll see the difference in approach when dealing with an armed and dangerous white man, versus dealing with a possibly armed black man. Somehow, police have all the time in the world to call backup, to talk to the white offender and wait for compliance and even then,  shoot one time and wait  an additional half an  hour for compliance but a subdued black man is killed  because he supposedly didn’t comply to the order of not moving when one officer’s knee is on his chest while the other one is kneeling in his torso.


The real truth is that white people are given respect, no matter their condition, rich poor saint or demon. The simple fact that they have been “blessed” with the coat of innocence prevents them from being killed no matter how guilty they are. But the black man, throughout history, has always been seen as less than and so when a white cop speaks he should simply become stiff like a piece of log to prevent himself from dying. What are the rights of black citizens in America when it comes to encounters with the police?  All these internet superintendents and chiefs of police, please let me know. Doesn’t a human being deserve to know what he is being accused of and to be treated with respect and dignity by the ones who are payed to protect and serve? Are the police in America only paid to protect and serve the white community, evident by their actions to always de-escalate situations with white offenders but killing black men, women and children on sight?

When will you stop justifying the murder of innocent people with their past wrap sheet. Once a person has done the prescribed time for a crime, they are no longer “guilty”of such crime. And in the instance when those police officers decided to murder that man, I am sure they didnt know that twenty years ago he was in prison for agrravated assault ecetera. So, since his criminal record wasn’t known at the time that he was executed, it is of no relevance when trying to justify the actions of the police. You know why the white media and justice system has always had to go this route to justify murder, it’s because 9 out of 10 times in the instance when the person is murdered they are not doing a darn thing to warrant being killed. When did we start killing people for 20 year old wrap sheets? Oh wait, Amerikkka have always been doing it to black people.

All in all, Alton Sterling has gone for 20 years without a criminal conviction so any sane  person would summize that it is possible he turned his life around and was trying his best to raise his kids, surviving in a system that doesn’t give you even a first chance, and clearly not a second, if you happen to be born the wrong shade.  Even if Alton had a gun on him, (which from what I saw, must be the tiniest gun in the world based on how the police took it from his pocket)he was of no threat to those police officers. He was the only one in danger in the whole altercation and now he is dead. Five children have lost their father, the oldest of which is fifteen years old. How do you expect this young man to feel knowing that his father was murdered in the streets by cops and white people are all over the media demonizing him and defending the actions of these officers?

How long do you think it will be before the cup runneth over? How many black people must die before we acknowledge that racism, lynching and white supremacy aren’t things of the past and have lived on from generation to generation, passed down from the bastards who first decided that my people were animals and deserved to be subjugated and brutalized? A token black friend doesn’t prevent anyone from being racist. If so many people have token black friends and claimed not to be racist there would be no one defending the actions of the police in any of the situations resulting in the death of a black man and especially not in this case.

I pray for the family of Mr. Alton Sterling  and I want them to know they dont greave alone.

#JusticeforAltonSterling  #blackGenocide  #BLACKLIVESMATTER


Really Tyga?

A post on Facebook that recently caught my eye read “Tyga talks bad about Jamaica in new music video,” which basically elaborated about the outrage that many Jamaicans had about what Tyga said about Jamaican Ghettos, crime, etc. Before I read the article,  I quickly watched the video because I really wanted to have a background so as to better understand why Jamaicans are outraged.

I went into the comment section and read a few of the comments and many were deffending the music video saying Tyga didn’t say anything about Jamaica that isnt true. Sufice it to say, what many don’t seem to understand about why Jamaicans would be outraged over such representation of our beloved Island, is we already know that Jamaica has problems and up to  the recent smear of CNN labeling Jamaaica as “an extremely violent place” we are already au fait  with the fact that Jamaica has a crime, a economic, a social problem and that seems to be all that is out there in the media about Jamaica, except for when we are showing our glory on the tracks. What I believe Jamaicans are expressing by this particular case of outrage is , there are other things in Jamaica and we would like for those things to be given a little attention instead of our country constantly being painted as if it’s a war zone. Fay Ellington defended the country after CNN’s attack saying Jamaica has pockets of violence and  though she came under scrutiny, even from those within our shores, she also didn’t say anything wrong. Jamaica cannot hide from its crime problems but we also do have pockets of violence in Jamaica much like anywhere else in the world and of all places, The US of A is one to talk. Jamaica is about the same size as the state of Illinois, possibly smaller and with a smaller population. The violence in south-side Chicago in a day far outweighs the whole crime stats for Jamaica in  half a year. But if you should average the violence of the whole country then Jamaica would be babies in comparison. Per Capita is  the supremacist way of demonizing others in a politically correct way while making themselves seem better. You’d think black Americans of all persons would understand this.

Tyga shouldn’t be the one to come to Jamaica talking about our ghettos and crime. When they have worst issues in America to deal with. When black Americans  stop dying in the streets for no reason, then Tyga might have footing to criticize Jamaica.

Even though my rant on what was said is so long, that isnt even the worst part of the video.

This negro went to Jamaica, a country that is roughly 90% black/negro/African people and  said, the only reason that made him stay was this bleach blond white girl, who mind you is clearly not a native to Jamaica. Even the uptown light skinned Jamaicans look nothing like this bleach, blond Becky who was the center piece of his video. While they were black Jamaican girls in the video, they were only used as props in an overly sexual way. The whole point of Tyga coming to Jamaica to shoot and record a music video is because he wants the Jamaican dance hall flare, the same flare that gave Justin Bieber’s “Sorry” Rihanna’s “Work” and Drake’s “Controlla”, which all have a Dancehall sound and structure, their status on the Billboard Charts. Many mainstream American artist have used/exploited Jamaica’s culture, some giving ‘respek’ while others dont (cough…Justin Bierber gtfoh with that tropical house bs, you know that’s Dancehall). But Tyga’s disrespect of Jamaicans on Jamaica’s soil is unforgivable. How can you say the only thing that causes you to want to stay in Jamaica, is an imported,  out of place white girl with bantu knots? If black Americans such as himself are still hung up on sleeping with massa, that is not something that we want to be associated with in Jamaica.

We are literally in the process of trying to rescue those who are constantly bleaching themselves because they think they are unworthy because they are black and here you come reinforcing  the very same bullshit that has eroded these people’s ability to love the skin they were born in.

I I wont even get into the other blatant stereotypes present in this video. However, I will reiterate, Tyga, or any other american isnt exactly the person to point out the flaws in Jamaica. Any smart person/country would know to pick the beam from their eyes before they pick the speck from someone else’s. As the good book says…”He who is without sin, let him cast the first stone.” Secondly, we don’t need you to export your self hatred to our island. It seems to be a trend with American black men to overly sexualize, exploit and discard black women while holding white women on a pedestal. We don’t need that kind of representation from a man who seems to be unable to find a woman who is age appropriate for him. We don’t need you to erode the work that we have been doing in Jamaica for years to uplift the average dark skinned woman.

Too many want the hype of brand Jamaica but have no respect for Jamaica and the Jamaican people. After all, isnt that what you call cultural appropriation in America?

And last but not least, the overall video was pointless and the song quite silly. This is a perfect example of instances where foreign invasion does more arm than good for our country.


Dance assault

Using the word disturbing is an understatement to describe what is happening in the danchehall realm of Jamaica. The video above shows a woman  being dragged around and treated like an inanimate object by men who have mothers, sisters and possibly daughters.

This kind of display is quite often the only thing that can be seen making waves across the varying social medias about my little home on the rock. It breaks my heart to see the level of violence and stupidity that has taken over the people of Jamaica.  With a vast majority of the population only seing violence as limited to murder and continue to be desensitized to the  violence against women and children that is rampant in the country and seems to be escalating on a rapid level, while being masked as fun.

When I watched this video, I could clearly see that this poor (silly) woman was trying, on several occasions, to escape her attackers but was unable to because they surrounded her like a pack of wolves going for the kill. The other sad thing is, the DJ was encouraging the behaviour  and boosting the croud to continue to cheer on these wild animal. Whats disheartenng to me about this seen, is that all the other patrons instead of helping this woman, were busy taking videos thinking of all the possible hits on their social media.

We have been so far removed from our humanity that we no longer see people needing help but click baits for social media fame.

But this post isnt about the effects of social media, but about the continued degradation of morals in Jamaica and the acceptance of violence as the norm. This woman here and countless others are being literally assaulted at these dance parties, all in the name of fun. Not even animals are treated in the manner in which these women are being handled and it’s all for what…fun? Violence is so normalized in Jamaica that unless someone is literally dead we don’t see certain beahviours as violent. Violence against woman as also been with us since the beginning of time and even though we have put laws it place, women still seem to be at the wrong end of a fist, a foot, a gun or knife. This behaviour is even learned and reinforced in the younger kids where videos of similar content and even worst are popping up on social media but the participants are much younger than the ones in this case.

I dont know when we will recognize that the only end result of tolerating these behviours is women being actually raped in these situations. Why do we always have to wait untill things get to the worst point before we take action. I hope that the voices of the few people who are speaking out against this new trend are being heard and the necessary stakeholders are taking steps to curb this trend before we have a rape epidemic on our hand. These  women clearly have no say in how they are being handled in the dancehall and that coupled  with all these horney and physcally strong men, i see a recipe for disaster. I hope I am just a pesimist and things don’t actually end where I see them going, if it (rape) hasnt actually happened before.

This video personally said it best, these men should be spending time in prision for these assualts disguised as dance.


If I see ‘of’ misused one more time

OMG, I am literally going to explode if I read another comment and see people using the word ‘of’ incorrectly. Where did this new wave of illiteracy come from? Is it a trend that I don’t know about? Please someone tell me, did the meaning and usage of the word ‘of’ change in the recent year. I am a teacher of English (second guessing my usage of the word of right now. sigh) and I am supposed to be au fait with the varying changes that occur in the English language, but this one has clearly slipped me.

I am well aware that as we develop as the human species, we invent new things, we coin new words which sometimes get added to the dictionary and graphed into the language. I am  also aware that many things don’t make sense in the English language. Like, goose becomes geese but moose doesn’t become meese. It just is a difficult and silly language. But with that said, certain words and their function are literally set in stone, like the word of. There is no time, or space, reason or season that I can think of that would justify changing the meaning and usage of the word of. But that doesn’t stop people from blowing up every social media time line throwing ‘ofs’ all over the place like nobody’s business.

Everyone has free will, to do what they want, when they want and how they want. But should free will be an excuse for people to be dropping abominations such as this?


I kid you not. The woman wrote “of been noticing that too.” I’ve seen many crazy usage of the word of and the most prominent one is usually could/should/would of been… But this one was just mind blowing. For a pronoun that separates a human from an inanimate object to be changed into a preposition, is just crazy. And you know whats funny, this atrocity that we see permeating social media and possibly real verbal dialogue between people is coming from…..you guessed it, the great America. Why Americans, why?

The same people who were outraged at Rihanna’s song “Work” calling it pure gibberish because she was using a non standard vernacular that they seem to look down on. Americans basically think every other language is below their version of English and other people across the world should make it their duty to learn English so that they can communicate with them when they go to visit their country, but when I see things like this I wonder, do Americans themselves know how to use basic English? This is not advanced English, this is the basic stuff. I mean come on.  I know they are going to say oh, that’s black America. Those n****rs are stupid as hell with their Ebonics but I can tell you, I have seen this stupidity across a wide racial cross section. It ain’t just the black people.



I wasn’t lying.

But, the race of the person who uses it is beside the point but also kinda the point. This obnoxious butchering of the English Language is actually more popular among African Americans and is testament to the poor quality of the education system in Black America. I am from Jamaica, where we speak both English and creole and I know that it can be a difficult task to teach kids (who speak another language) English, but I also know that this basic level of English isn’t even something to teach, it just is. So I cannot fathom what has caused this shift in the ability of people in an “English Speaking”  country, such as America, to actually make proper use of simple words such as I’ve, have been etc. I really don’t get it.

Maybe these smart phones are actually making us dumber than we think. This auto correct isn’t a joke. I know sometimes auto correct messes up the sh**t out of what we type and before you know it  you post a comment and you have the internet grammar police on your ass. But I know this isn’t one such  instance when auto correct is the guilty party. I know this is evidence of the deterioration of the human brain. I bet even though there was that bright red line under that word ‘of’in both those comments, the people behind those comments had no idea why that red line was there.

In the end, no one is perfect and people should be tolerant of other peoples languages, abilities and disabilities. But also, it is our duty to identify and address problems that we see arising in the society and when a person who learned English as a second language knows more English/ English nuances than actual native English speakers, Houston we have a problem.

So cheers to freedom of speech, but please if you choose a particular language to express that freedom, try to use it properly. And Americans, stop being so “judgy” at other people’s vernaculars, because you ain’t perfect either.

Work, work, work work, work, seh me affi work work….

The thinking


I am who I am, inspite of many things. I have been shaped and developed, molded and bent…but I have never been broken. I have chosen to live how I do. Chosen to make the difficult decisions, knowing they would not be easy. My baggage is colorful, with many pieces, but it can easily be handled and carried by myself alone. But there are moments when it seems too hard…that I have had to be strong too long. I am competent but it doesn’t mean I don’t want  someone to help me. The idea that I could be protected, cherished, cared for and loved, seems like a distant childhood memory. Too many times people shut down, become hardened by their experiences, but I am not one of them. Perhaps its because I made the choice to be where I am, knowing what would happen as a result. Maybe its because…

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The Voice Inside My Head

Why the hell cant I just say what wtf I want to say to  people? Why is it that even when my unbridled tongue is justified I still hold back? Am I a coward?

Countless times, friends, family, relations and otherwise piss me off so much. They do so much to disrespect me, to hurt me deliberately or otherwise. All these instances arise from them not ever thinking of how what they say and sometimes do will affect me. As long as they are comfortable people feel the need to say whatever comes to mind, no matter the repercussions.

But as for me I can never muster up the courage or whatever is necessary to be so blunt with a person even when it is deserved. This officially pisses me off. Why cant I just say what I fucking think and just get it over with? I always end up having arguments with myself in my head of the things that I should have said. And this is not because I am not witty enough to have said them on spot, because I usually think of them at the time but I always end up saying some milder version in an attempt not to completely crush a person.

For someone who usually does’t care to be friends with a person who I’ve argued with, I really go through pain staking measures not to cause irreparable damage. Even today, I found myself typing an entire text message to send out and deleting the whole thing because I knew it would have caused serious hurt to the receiver. But what I typed needs to be said and exactly in the words that I typed it. Now its not and wont expressed typed or otherwise. The context and atmosphere befitting is null and as such the impact will be diminished and possibly miss interpreted. So now and like many other instances, I live with what I want to say on the inside and sometimes, most times even if opportunity presents itself more than once, I still never say what I really want to say.

The way I see it is that even if I don’t care to be friends with a person, a person is a person and I should still be considerate of his/her feelings. But why though, since no one seems to be considerate of mine.

Even though I wish I could just tell people what the fuck I really want to say to them, the truth is I don’t have it in me. I end up feeling horrible if I say something really nasty to a person, even if its the truth, so inadvertently, I hurt myself.

A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

For Inhibitions

Life has a strange way of kicking me

Every time I go against my instinct

The walls come crumbling

Happiness is just an illusion

Why do I bother to chase it?

The moment I let go of inhibitions

Take a plunge

Make the attempt, against better judgment

To live, to laugh

Life just takes over

And reminds me just how muck

It sucks

In everything, there is a time; a place

A season and a reason

Some get everything and some

Get nothing

They cycle of life continues

Just a few lines of my thoughts  written in 2 minutes and a reminder that my happiness should really solely depend on me because every time I leave it up to someone else, I always end up recovering, pulling myself out of some unnecessary trench of sorrow, pain and heartache. I’ve never disappointed myself and I have learned from  long ago that the only one I can truly depend on is myself. But like most I suffer from that one flaw that unfortunately I can’t correct…I am human.

A friend once asked me if reincarnation was real, what would I want to come back as? I said a fish and my friend got very upset, because, he thought that I was stupid to want to be a creature of chance. Just a little fish without intelligence,  a thing that can be caught in a net and just die or be eaten or something like that. Of course he forgot that there are actually bigger fishes in the sea that don’t necessarily live such a chance life, but that was irrelevant because I really wasn’t thinking of being a whale. Just a tiny fish with the entire ocean surrounding me.

My friend actually was appalled that a human being would denounced being human, the greatest thing ever invented, and choose to be an insignificant fish. But, it was much deeper than that for me. Humans believe or not are really not all that.

“Blue is the ocean
Calling me in
Calling me near
If I could only learn
To breathe down here
I know I would be
At home under the sea
Yeah” ___Leanne Rimes

This verse at that time and for many years while I was growing up spoke to me because it encapsulated my exact feeling about life as a human. And today, in a time when I was most happy, in a split second I was brought right back to this place. But hey, on the bright side, I have learned to swim and now I can actually take a real plunge in the ocean every once in a while. Come to think of it,  the ocean did play a part of what sank my happiness today, but I’m not letting that ruin the sea for me, after all, it really was an innocent bystander in the whole shebang.

I still hold steadfast to my desire to be a fish. If hurt is all I can get from humans, I’ll take my chances in the sea, second time around.

P.S. Ignore the context, focus on the art.